Idaho's Beauty

I recently traveled to the gorgeous state of Idaho for my sisters wedding. While I was there I was in awe of its beauty. Beauty that simply can't be captured, but I tried! Most of these photos were captured with my iPhone and don't do it justice, but I thought I'd share them anyway!  This trip stirred up an old purpose and passion in me. Some may know, I use to love photography,  and  still do, but I have resorted to capturing more of the everyday basics (like my kids) without my DSLR camera. But, Idaho awoke that passion to get behind a lens again and pursue more of my talent in this field!

My passion for photography started in college and never had the chance to blossom due to life circumstances. I dabbled here and there, but I never had the time, money, or energy to fully invest. But now that my kids are mostly in school, I have more time and energy, I've decided to engage once again. My passion revolves around being able to capture beauty in the simple things and bringing them to life! The two main things that draw me into this world are the beauty of nature and the beauty of individual personalities shining through each image! I'm excited for a new adventure and to see where it leads me. These are just a few of the images that have inspired and revived this passion in me! 

2018 recap

2018 was a very bittersweet year for us, and probably one of the hardest so far. Looking back this is most likely the very reason I had no motivation to blog. Due to the lack of posts during this year, I figured I might as well do a quick recap on some of the most memorable moments... 

We started the year off rough, a water pipe burst, flooding our entire downstairs. This led to needing all new flooring which took over a month to order and install. We were lucky enough to have amazing friends that let us stay with them while some of the major repairs were being made. This also happened in the midst of our biggest project yet, painting the cabinets. It was nice to have a brand new kitchen after all the extra stress. We had several snow days full of fun and birthdays to celebrate. Autumn turned 1 and Zeek turned 5. Unfortunately, Jonny was bedridden with the flu during Zeeks celebration at Chuckie Cheese! Once things calmed down, Jonny & I had the amazing opportunity to celebrate him turning 30 with a getaway to Asheville. One of our best trips yet! We had family adventures and fun times exploring. Zeek graduated from Preschool. Jonny surprised me with another getaway for my 30th birthday to lake Jocassee. We camped right on the lake and had an amazing time kayaking and paddle boarding. We grew some amazing friendships and had fun adventures and quality time with them. Jonny & I finally got our matching deer tattoos. But then we also had to say farewell to several close friends that moved away!

Our family had the amazing opportunity to fly to the Oregon coast and stay in a beach house with my entire family to celebrate my parents 40th wedding anniversary! This was such a once in a life time experience, exploring the very coast my mom grew up on and the coast my parents honeymooned on years ago. This family time will forever be cherished! Jonny and I celebrated 9 years of marriage. Zeek started his first year at the elementary school! He's our big kindergartner. It was a rough start with lots of anxiety and fears that we worked through and now he's loving school. He was even picked by his classmates to earn the Terrific Kid award! We are so proud of him. This year was full of more snuggles than I'd ever want from our kiddos. Thanksgiving was bittersweet since we had no extend family celebrations due to the fact that all our kids were sick. But we had a fun mini celebration as our small family. Zeek participated in lots of school activities like the fun run and his Christmas choir program. And Christmas came and went before we knew it. The kids got a trampoline and send every day outside jumping! We ended the year in the midst of exploring several medical issues (depression, OCD, auto-immune disorders, and migraines) which made it a hard ending to the year, having no answers to move forward with! One word to summarize the year would be 'Bittersweet'. With all the bad and hard things we faced there was always a blessing that came along with it, and we attribute that to our loving God! 

Autumn Grace

Autumn Grace: a name to represent & remind us of a change of season & mindset in our lives that has been filled with needed grace upon grace from from God! ...  She has been such an unknown blessing to come sliding (literally, I'll explain later) into our lives, growing our love beyond understanding! She is our miracle baby and I can not express the level of joy she brings to our home, not just for me, but for the entire family, esp the two older babes! And calling her a 'happy baby' does not do justice for just how joyous she really is; smiles & giggles are unending with her daily. Autumn is our third baby which makes it seem like she's growing up even faster than imaginable and I don't want to look back and realize I didn't document her early life as I did the others. So, here's to continuing with the pictures, memories, & mommy rants on the blog! 

A Morning in Motherhood

** I know most of you moms can relate to this post, and looking back at it, all I can do is laugh! Here is just a snapshot of what motherhood looks like...

My morning...

Wake up & shower to emerge to a sleeping hubby & screaming baby! Dress as fast as possible feed the baby & rush to my OB/gyn appt. About 2 minutes away from the doctors office, I get a flat tire! I pull off & assess, nope, no driving on it! Call to see if they can postpone my appt as I wait for my hubby. Nope, can't delay the appt. they simply cancelled it & have to call me to reschedule bc my doctor is too busy! 

The hubby gets to my car & he stays to fix the tire while I take the kids... we head to the park, only to find out halfway there the kids don't have shoes on! So, we turn around & head home!

We get home & I think things will calm down. Nope, wrong again! I pull Autumn out of her car seat to get poop all over my hand bc she's leaked out of her diaper, all up her back & on her legs! I change her & get everything cleaned! Head upstairs to put her to sleep.

I turn the stairs & my son is on the pot, pooping! So, I make him wait while I nurse & put Autumn to sleep! Oh wait, her crib sheet is not changed & has the huge pee spot from her leaking out last night! I change the sheet while she's screaming, my son is yelling "I'm done, mommy! Wipe me!" ... 

I put Autumn in the crib, let her cry... go wipe Zeek! Get him clean... and then go back to rock Autumn to sleep! 

It's now 10:15 & I'm just now sitting down to drink my first sip of (cold) coffee & eat breakfast!

iPhone Photo Post

*Recent Life according to my phone*

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-Jumping way back to summer time bc I've been so slack at posting-

Date nights with my man, snuggles with my babes, matchy-matchy, lake trips with friends, the hubs newest ink, my sweet girl, the big surprise, my entire family came to spend some time together, & the last time I did yoga since my pregnancy began!

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Zeek's first sports experience was t-ball, family hikes, this spoiled pup waiting for food, 18 weeks preggo, finding out our lil surprise is a girl, my blue eyed babe, family time apple picking, & a special night away for the hubby and I gifted by some amazing friends!   

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All these pictures are from our mini babymoon trip to the mountains! We ate out, enjoyed the mountains, explored a vineyard, road around in a golf cart, read Harry Potter, & took a mini hike! It's always so refreshing spending time away with my man rekindling our love.

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sweet baby snuggles, it's finally cool enough outside to chop wood, my needy/snugly babes, they both love this mini playground/slide we pulled out of storage, I highly recommend this book - it has great reminders and  was so good for my heart to re-evaluate with, family fire nights, snuggles for Autumn, & his first big disobedient act & punishment!  

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Halloween at its finest - "Expecto Patronum", she's such a daddy's girl, bff's, family adventure to Campbell's covered bridge, my girl loves the dirt now, & she loves giving Autumn snuggles too! 

Wrestling with Life

After reading back through my previous posts I was reminded of the beauty of documenting life through this little blog. It's so good for my heart to re-read just how far I have come over the past year & to see the life changing events that have taken place, whether those are just daily life tasks or major life milestones. It's just so easy to forget those details  in the midst of new journeys &/or trials. So, here I am again... attempting to blog and document life! 

To be completely honest, I find myself in a season of self-discovery and acceptance. A stay at home mom to two little ones and pregnant with the biggest surprise of our life, I constantly have to remind myself daily, that this IS God's plan and it's all for a reason. This pregnancy has not been easy, physically, mentally, or emotionally. But it's happening during one of the toughest times for many around us, reminding us of God's blessing on our family. We're learning to love, grieve, process, and accept things we never imagined and it's so tough, yet so good for our ever-changing hearts & souls. This is life. And this is what life is about. Growing, changing & loving...

I'm continually asking myself "who am I" and "just where do I fit in..."! I'm sure every mom has wrestled with these questions, but they're starting to form the whirlwind of life I'm currently in and it's rather overwhelming. So, this is me reminding myself, I don't have to have it all together and most likely never will, but being real and vulnerable is usually a good place to start! 

So, as of now, I'm 23 weeks pregnant with Autumn Grace, our biggest surprise. We thought we were done having kids after two, simply bc we had such a rough time with Ivy as a newborn (so much depression & exhaustion left us drowning). When we felt like we finally started to get a handle on life again, that was exactly when God threw us the curve ball of finding out we were pregnant (while on birth control & before Ivy even turned 1).  After several weeks of this sinking in, we thought we lost Autumn because of some complications, but she has proven to be a fighter! God has given us peace & grace during the processing time for all of it to sink in. And now we are so eager to meet her in February... Ivy has just started walking this week at 16 months old and has entered a stage of cuteness, that is just heart-melting, with her talking & understanding so much more. This has been a breath of fresh air from her previous phase, her very unhappy infant phase. Zeek is still such a sweet big brother with the most tender heart, but just as rambunctious & my lil super-hero fighting, dirt loving boy! I love watching how sweet he is talking about and informing everyone of miss Autumn Grace in my belly. Jonny is really enjoying his job these days, but it does come with some tough situations that make relationships & life difficult (cancer, death, divorce, sin, etc.)! But God is good & is constantly giving us both understanding, peace, & grace during these times! ... That's where we are, living in constant grace and love trying to process life as best as we can! 

Eleven Months

Ivy at 11 months...

- has started pulling up on things, she gets to her knees but can't quite make it to her feet!

- says "mama" "dada" & "yaay" ... but understands & smiles when you say "Zeek" or "Nala".

- loves waving hi & bye and loves to clap when she hears any music.

- giggles the most when chasing (flying through the air) big bro around the couches.

- hates drinking from a sippy cup. She thinks they're just for chewing on!

- is still waiting on more teeth (still just has the two bottom front ones).

- is super excited to meet Gramps & Aunt SheShe next month at her 1st birthday!  

iPhone Photo Post

***Recent life according to my iPhone***

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Sibling love, "loud drinks" aka "Hulk Drinks" aka smoothies with Zeek, bedtime routine means cram into the bathroom especially when friends are over, our destructive baby is on the move, I love making Jonny be my yoga partner so I can try new things, backyard picnics are perfect on sick days, pike headstand, park time with friends that have become like family, and Zeek exploring the dentist's office. He did great!

Post workout smoothies and walks to check on the garden have become a regular thing, baby plants that now look nothing like that, finally redeeming my Valentines day gift - alone time is precious, even more so when you're being pampered, yoga everyday, those eyes, Zeek folded his first batch of laundry and did awesome, it took a while but I got the forearm stand. Accomplishing goals is so liberating, the boys brought me breakfast in bed - just because, and Zeek loves to copy my yoga poses and 'exercise' with me!  

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Playdates are the best and seeing these babes actually interact is so adorable, my first batch of rosemary was frozen in some olive oil for later use, trying new things and succeeding, airplane time, I may or may not have cheated on my diet for that doughnut, she's still rocking the 0-3mn clothes, bubbles, breakfast with friends is a great excuse to get out of the house, and my very first time strawberry picking!!